February 20, 2018

Struggling with Kids Homework

Struggling with Kids HomeworkSchool’s back in session. This brings cheers and groans from parents. The groans are for the struggling with kids homework. The cheers are for much needed breathing space from said kids!

I have an idea! Let’s change things up. Click like below if you are on board! No more hassles over the homework! Done – finished, great! Wait, how? Hasn’t that been the reason we are where we are today. Don’t know the how. NO LONGER. Starting here, we are moving forward on making this their responsibility and removing ourselves from the equation. Here we go!

Struggling with Kids Homework

Remember that homework hassles are often discipline problems in disguise. Defuse the power struggles by following the cardinal rules of discipline in general: set limits that are reasonable — and stick to them when it’s realistic. Full story here.

Did you ever think about this? The homework battle is really a power battle and must be treated accordingly. Now I know, some kids do need help, so here is a video that helps with determining if your child requires academic assistance.

For me, that clears up the often nagging question when struggling with kids homework – academic versus lazy!

So next comes us! That’s right we take on way too much responsibility for their homework completion. Examine yourself.  Do you feel  their getting their work done is a reflection on you or worse, your parenting capability? Now I have definitely been in the boat where the teacher has blamed me and expected me to ensure it is completed. But no more. My completing their work or standing over them nagging until my head explodes does not an education give! Here is a great article that will help you remove your tentacles, umm I mean issues, and put the work back where it belongs, on your kid!

If you carry more of the worry, fear, disappointments, and concern than your child does about his work, ask yourself “What’s wrong with this picture and how did this happen?” (Remember, as long as you carry their concerns, they don’t have to.)

Guide Your Child—Don’t Try to Control Him

Many parents tell me that their children are not motivated to do their work. I believe that children are motivated—they just may not be motivated the way you’d like them to be. Here are some concrete tips to help you guide them in their work without having to nag, threaten or fight with them.

Ask yourself what worked in the past: Think about a time when your child has gotten homework done well and with no hassles. What was different? What made it work that time? Ask your child about it and believe what he says. See what works and motivates him instead of what motivates you.

Stop the nightly fights. The way you can stop fighting with your kids over homework every night is to stop fighting with them tonight. Disengage from the dance. Choose some different steps or decide not to dance at all. Let homework stay where it belongs—between the teacher and the student. Refuse to get pulled in by the school in the future. Stay focused on your job, which is to help your child do his job. Click here to read more of this article.

This year I have decided to be a bit more organized in our day. The tweet below may be extreme in scheduling but it gives you a start. I have found a simple rule here that works; electronics AFTER homework.

If we want less struggles with kids homework, it must start with us and how we approach it. Hand this back to the kid, turn on the game or grab your book and gain some peace in your house! Oh and please don’t forget to share any ideas that have worked for you.

About the author: By

Julie is an awesome parent (along with her husband Matt) to five adopted kiddos and the owner of the Parenting Allies website.

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Disclaimer: We are not psychologists, counselors, or therapists. We are parents of children with special challenges, and the techniques, tools, and programs we recommend on this website have worked for us on our parenting journey.

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